REASSURANCE FROM MY REDEEMER, ROSE OF SHARON, REVEALER AND RIGHTEOUS JUDGE

I rapidly ran in the wrong direction. I remained in that ruthful place too long. There I began to rebel against the spiritual life I once desired and my actions became raunchy. Thank goodness, HE reprimanded me constantly and reminded me I would have to reap what I was sowing.

I tried to rectify the situation on my own. But, this wasn’t realistic. I merely rehashed past mistakes and memories which made me ruthful. Once I started feeling sorry for myself, I then repeated the behavior. And, each time I took a step backwards my resilience to yielding to temptation was lessen.

My sinful life is repulsive. I need to raise my white flag and ask HIM to release me from the strongholds that keep me from being reformed. I am praying for HIM to rescue me and HE will. HE will receive me with open arms. HE promises to restore what I allowed satan to destroy. However, I know there are requirements. I MUST be reborn. I have to put in the work and try not to revert back to my sinful ways. Also, I need to read HIS Word and apply it to my life daily.

Recently, HE sent someone to make me realize what I would need to do to accomplish these tasks. I MUST be radically “sold out” for Jesus. I need to redirect my energy to doing the work I was intended to do. I can no longer take the risk of losing my salvation for a few moments of pleasing the flesh. Especially, remembering the flesh is truly NEVER satisfied.

I needed some time to reflect. Afterwards, I repented.  HE instantly reminded me that I am REGAL and I need to start carrying myself as such. HE then promised to revive all dead things that HE wanted alive and to reprehend all things unwanted! Things were about to be refreshed in my life. There will be a revival within my soul. I readily accepted this. All I could do was praise HIS name and vow to reverence HIM in ALL things from that point!

 © 2013 Yvette M. Pierce

In all things pray and seek the Lord. Allow Him to help you make decisions-not Kooley! These are just my thoughts, opinion and experiences.

PLEASE DO NOT USE/COPY MY WORK WITHOUT MY PERMISSION OR WITHOUT APPROPRIATELY CITING ~Yvette M. Pierce

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IN SPITE OF IT ALL, HE...

My husband isn't perfect. Our marriage is up and down like a roller coaster. Yet, at the end of the day I know this man loves me like no other. Unfortunately I know at THE CURRENT TIME I don't deserve this kind of unconditional love. Yes, I said it. No, I'm not insecure or have low self-esteem. I KNOW I AM WORK IN PROGRESS!

We didn't have a conventional courtship. And, our marriage follows suit. Our "meetings"/ Mr. Delivery Man stage lasted about 2 months. Our courtship was about 3 weeks and our engagement was for 4 hours. We literally had to learn each other AFTER saying "I do". I'm not saying this was the right/wrong or the smart/dumb way to do things. It's just how we did it.

Unfortunately, when he found me I was a total emotional wreck and carried a lot of baggage. HE helps me unpack one layer at a time and LOVES ME ANYWAY.

I can be overbearingly controlling. HE tries to compromise and LOVES ME ANYWAY.

My mood changes like the wind. HE tries to respect my current state and LOVES ME ANYWAY.

My health hasn't been the best over the years. HE takes care of me and LOVES ME ANYWAY.

I've made some stupid decisions and many men would've walked away. HE forgave me and LOVES ME ANYWAY.

It's not like I tried to take advantage of his kindness. Nor does he allow me to walk over him. I believe he feels the love I have for him. He knows I am willing to do what it takes to improve.

But most of all, I KNOW he sees the woman God has destined me to become and this is what allows him to LOVE ME ANYWAY!

In all things pray and seek the Lord. Allow Him to help you make decisions-not Kooley! These are just my thoughts, opinion and experiences.

A FIGHT FOR MY LIFE

TRU STORY: There was a fight in the ladies’ public restroom. Of course this wasn’t my intention. I wasn’t thinking and entered that tiny space with one thing on my mind...getting it on. I’m pretty sure someone probably heard the ruckus and thought something freaky was going on. No such luck.

I don’t know what possessed me to think I could put on a Bodyshaper ”Spanx” in the stall of a public restroom. For one, I had to try and balance myself so my feet would stay on the paper towels I placed on the floor. That’s when a lot of the noise came about...me falling against the walls. Once I got my legs in, I struggled trying to pull the bodyshaper up…I was breathing so loud and heavy. I started getting light-headed so I had to wobble and get some tissue to cover the toilet seat before I sat down. Finally, I literally fell down. A concerned lady asked from the other side of the stall, “Hey are you alright in there?” I replied faintly, “I’m okay (Telling a lie)!"

At that very moment, as sweat beaded on my nose, I decided enough was enough! I just couldn’t go any further. I pulled that death trap off, pull myself together and exited the stall. I threw that thing over my shoulder, washed my hands and headed for the door. I looked back at the lady and said, “I had a fight with a pair of Spanx. I was determined to get it on and evidently it was determined I wasn’t. The score...Yvette-0: Spanx-1!"

In all things pray and seek the Lord. Allow Him to help you make decisions-not Kooley! These are just my thoughts, opinion and experiences.

I SHOULD'VE KEPT MY GOODIES

This blog update is for grown folks. If discussing anything about being intimate makes you uncomfortable then STOP READING right now.

"No, there isn’t any sexy lingerie under this big t-shirt."
"Heels?-you betta get somewhere and SAT it down!"
"Sex?-didn’t we do that last week?"
"Candles?-I’ve been standing over that hot stove.”

This is my reality now. Ideas no longer come easy and making love is the last thing on my mind. Over the years, I desensitized myself to romance. I gorged myself of intimate moments that were design for husband and wife. Although I’m in an undefiled relationship, I have to make a conscious effort to be spontaneous, loving and fun.Yet, I was able to give freely while I was in sin. This is so unfair to my man who deserves my attention, affection and romance.

I struggled with this blog update. After writing three versions of it, I decided to be true to myself and write just the way I was feeling it. I couldn’t sugarcoat it out of fear of offending someone, being judged or revealing too much. I will admit I don’t believe it’s acceptable to have sex before marriage. Unfortunately, I believe one thing and did another. This is one of the reasons I felt the need to share this information. Read on…

Regardless of the reasons, I was promiscuous at an early age. Sex was a tool…a weapon…a way to control. I didn’t value IT or my body at all. And, what you don’t value, you won’t protect. I continuous gave my goodies to males other than my husband.

During those years, I learned I was very romantic. Romance came to me as naturally as breathing. Normally, anything that comes naturally comes effortlessly. You tend to give these things freely. It was nothing for me to convert my living room into a VIP section of a nightclub (lights and dance routine included). Once I decorated my bedroom to look like an island. I had the kiddie pool, sand and beach chairs. These are just a few ideas out of hundreds I brought to reality. I gave my time and talent to males that didn’t deserve or appreciate it. I gave until my well was dry.

Are you asking what is the point of this blog update? One, I want to remind you there is a lot of pain and consequences to face when you don't follow God's instructions-point blank! Two, we must be very careful NOT to give “friends” the benefits designed for a spouse. Lastly, we have to look past “The Right Now” to prepare for "The Right Time” with “The Right One…The Only One…OUR SPOUSE”!

In all things pray and seek the Lord. Allow Him to help you make decisions-not Kooley! These are just my thoughts, opinion and experiences.

AUTOBIOGRAPHY

         

Some chapters will be exciting and others boring. I will quickly share achievements. Therefore, it would only be fair to speak on disappointing times. None of this information will be to boast or ask for sympathy. It’ll be written to express myself...to show someone he or she isn’t alone in their concerns & struggles...to make someone LOL...and others to STH (shake their head).

Some will skim over the Table of Contents trying to identify only things that is pertinent to their life. Then, so effortlessly, flip through my work deciphering what THEY think is important.

There are a few that will only read the Acknowledgments to see if they recognize the individual/people I think played a big enough role in my life to receive accolades.

Some will only read the Foreword then try to sum up my life by just these few words. Words meant to be an introduction to an eventful journey not a tool to pass judgment.

There will be a faithful few who will look forward to interacting with my thoughts. Regardless of where my book will fit in the ole Dewy Decimal System, they will continue to read my work. Others will continue to cheer me on and use my work as a much needed comedy break.

To all the ones that aren't interested in reading my rough draft-thinking it has no substance, step away from my manuscript. If you can't stand by me while I make mistakes, use the wrong tone or can’t get my point across swiftly, surely I don't want you around once my work is edited and tucked in a nice leather cover. I won't need your time, once my pages are smoothed and lined in gold. If I never make it on the Bestseller List, yet my words have inspired one person or made someone ROTFL then I can say it was worth opening up my life to share with others.

THE END

Of course, this has a double meaning. I am really comparing the reactions of people in my present life to the possible reactions of folks if I ever wrote an autobiography. People are quick to judge you although they don’t know the complete story. However, there are some that will stand by you when you are a piece of coal until you transform into a beautiful diamond-flaws and all!

Taz, thanks for the inspiration.

In all things pray and seek the Lord. Allow Him to help you make decisions-not Kooley! These are just my thoughts, opinion and experiences.

Another Point of View About My Husband's Other Lover

Someone (who doesn't want his name mentioned) sugggested I write a poem from a different angle. So, he dropped these lyrics for me. *Tear* Tear*. I'm so proud of...my Butte....this person!

********

Mister, Mister,

The man idealizing the celeb drama queen, who's soul is captured by social idea and turns wholesome into public pain

She does nothing but drain your brain with repeating plots of beautiful women, drugs, violence, and sex…

…checking for every guy with pecks

You are just her next step

Wake up and realize that this is not reality but fiction at its prime

Go outside and find time to live life as if you are in your youthful peak

So awaken your mind and life’s divine

Anonymous Author (who lives with me and under the age of 17 yo)
March 17, 2013

In all things pray and seek the Lord. Allow Him to help you make decisions-not Kooley! These are just my thoughts, opinion and experiences.

MY HUSBAND HAS ANOTHA LOVER

My husband has a mistress, this I know is true
I approved of it in the beginning. Now, I don't know what to do.

He's tried to convince me that all of this is just my imagination
But when he's in her presence, it is she that has his concentration

He looks at her as though they are ONE and the only ones in the room.           
This is what my heart has longed for every day since OUR honeymoon.

Don't miss understand, I know his love for me is real
I just want to make him feel better than the way she makes him feel.

I often sit amongst them envious as can be
wondering if she'll ever release her grip and set my man free.

He rushes home to turn her on to escape the outside world
While I stand flabbergasted at the way he craves this girl

I have to admit the entire family enjoys her from time to time
But, this "love thing" with husband has gotten way out of line.

So, I'm coming to you for your advice
I'm wondering if I should relax and let this man just live his life

Or should I throw that whore out the door
What should I do with Ms. Television... Ms. Movie...that's the other "woman" that my husband adores?

March 16-17, 2013

In all things pray and seek the Lord. Allow Him to help you make decisions-not Kooley! These are just my thoughts, opinion and experiences.

WHAT'S IT TO YOU?

TRU STORY: It seems as though I need to have this same conversation every six months. So, after been asked the same question for the past week, I think it’s time. Take this journey with me. Imagine me minding my own business and someone stops me. They don't want to just speak or to ask how the family is doing. I probably could understand if we talked on a regular. Okay, just allow me to paraphrase these conversations.


Bold person: “Hey, Kooley, I haven’t seen you in a minute. Dang, you were a lot smaller then. You gained a lot of your weight back. But, you still have a nice shape.”

Inconsiderate Idiot #2: “What’s up, girl? I see you gained all that hind parts back. How much weight have you gained, with yo’ little waist self”?

My customary response to both: “Why? You don’t have to lift, feed or clothe me.”

The moral of the story: You don’t know what a person is going through. They might be on the brink of suicide. What if they need medication for a mental disorder…suffering from insomnia, took too much medication and on their way to a behavioral health facility...
.....


PS: Just because you throw, what YOU think is a compliment, on the end doesn’t make you less insensitive!

In all things pray and seek the Lord. Allow Him to help you make decisions-not Kooley! These are just my thoughts, opinion and experiences.

MALES-YOU GOTTA LOVE 'EM

Hear ye...Hear ye,

Sometimes I wonder what my Father was thinking when he made MALE…when He decided to make more than one of them. I’m not bashing that sex because I’ve tried to raise two of those species. Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing like a God-fearing, nice looking, well-dressed intelligent man. But, I declare once they fall in love with a woman all sense of logic leaves their mind.

I can’t speak for all males, only the ones that have crossed my path over the years. DISCLAIMER: I AM NOT REFERRING TO MY HUSBAND (o_0). If this isn’t describing any of the men that are currently in your life, then my hat is being tipped for your blessing. However, if you are saying you’ve never met a man as such, then you might be telling a little white one. (Smile)

Once a man falls in love, he forgets how to dress himself on a daily basis. I understand if you need to occasionally ask how something vibes with another piece of clothing. But, every time you pick up a shirt, you don’t have to ask if it needs ironing. If I can see the wrinkles across the room, I know you see them while holding it in your hand.

Who chose your food before you got in a committed relationship? I can’t tell you what you are going to eat or what you have a taste for. If I tell you I’m not cooking, then you are pretty much on your own all the way around.

While on my soapbox, allow me to touch on the subject of sex. Yes, I am going there. Remember, I AM NOT TALKING ABOUT MY HUSBAND. Unfortunately, I didn’t live my life as God instructed. Therefore, there was sex with other partners back in the days. Plus, you see it everywhere you look. It’s in the movie theaters, on the television and in things you read.

Even during sex most men don’t think logically. Why do they have to keep talking? Don’t get me wrong, no one wants silence the entire time. A little conversation for him and some quiet time for me would be fair. Another pet peeve of mine-thinking I want to answer so many questions? And why can’t they give you time to answer one before they ask another? And, two of the stupidest question are, “Whose is this?” and “Is this mine?” Correct me if I am wrong, but I thought THAT WAS ESTABLISHED WHEN WE DECIDED TO BE IN A COMMITTTED RELATIONSHIP TOGETHER. How would you handle it if I answered with, “It’s my personal trainer’s”? Use your head!

Now, back to your daily routine.

In all things pray and seek the Lord. Allow Him to help you make decisions-not Kooley! These are just my thoughts, opinion and experiences.

WANTED AND NEEDED

All I ever wanted was someone to love me unconditionally

All I ever needed was the ability to accept the love of someone

All I ever wanted was to stand in HIS presence and strip down to expose all of my flaws and reveal my many issues and he acknowledges them but can’t…no, he WON'T...be moved from my side

All I ever needed was the ability to accept his shortcomings and believe in his dreams while standing as a pillar of support for HIM

All I ever wanted was to fall asleep in the arms of my lover
All I ever needed was to wake up beside my best friend

All I ever wanted was the chance to trust someone
All I ever needed was to live the lifestyle that proves I can be trusted

All I ever wanted was to stand in a crowded room and observe HIM looking through others to SEE ONLY ME
All I ever needed was to be amongst many but be completely satisfied with just that ONE

All I ever wanted was to have inside jokes, secret codes and chances to act silly with HIM
All I ever needed was to cry less and reasons to laugh more

All I ever wanted were the things that didn’t come easy
All I ever needed was to stop making everything so hard and wait patiently

In all things pray and seek the Lord. Allow Him to help you make decisions-not Kooley! These are just my thoughts, opinion and experiences.

YEARNING

It's sad when you have to accept something is no good FOR or TO you. There can be anguish accepting you have to give IT up. Sometimes this thing is only an arm length away and you have to force yourself to walk the other direction. There will be moments when you will desire IT with every fiber in your body. However, you can’t yield to temptation. You may hear or see something that reminds you of times you had IT. You have to remove that visual in the physical and mental rim.There are times your body will remember how it felt to indulge in IT. The body will also take you through so many changes once it no longer partakes in that pleasure.


This isn't something I read in a book. I experienced this for myself. In fact, I am longing for IT as I type. I crave IT with a passion. I dream of IT. However, I will continue to resist this. My desire to live a better life is stronger than my desire to acquire this stronghold. I WILL NOT DRINK A DIET MOUNTAIN DEW! What? DMD was my lover!

In all things pray and seek the Lord. Allow Him to help you make decisions-not Kooley! These are just my thoughts, opinion and experiences.